As the lockdown in South Africa continues, the longing totry new things increases.
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For some people, living with their partners during lockdownhas shown cracks in their relationships that they hadn't seen before. This hasbeen the case for Thandi* from Johannesburg.
Thandi* spoke to DRUM about her online affair that started aweek after the president announced the lockdown.
"My boyfriend and I have been together for about five years.We kind of lived together back when we were in varsity but we both had our ownliving arrangements. We both thought it would be a good idea to be in lockdowntogether since we are far from home and it isn't something new for us," shesays.
Her affair started after lockdown and it wasn't somethingshe was planning to have. The thought of doing the same thing for over a monthhad her looking for something with somebody else.
"Being indoors the entire day means we both have a lot oftime on our hands and we run out of things to do. Lockdown is new to everyoneand doing the same thing every day is taking its toll on me. We're both workingfrom home, so we don't have time apart. The only time we are not together iswhen we're showering or when one of us buys groceries. My job requires me to beon social media most of the time and I find myself being distracted by thecrazy things that happen on there.
"I started speaking to an old friend of mine from universityafter seeing his picture on Instagram. I was the one who initiated theconversation, but I don't quite remember who made the first move. I wouldn'tnecessarily call it an affair or cheating because we're far from one anotherand we're both in relationships. Some people may see it that way because myboyfriend doesn't know what's happening," the 27-year-old says.
When asked about how she maintains both her relationships,Thandi did not hesitate to speak about how her schedule works.
"I have something like a schedule, it sounds crazy I knowbut it isn't that bad. My boyfriend knows that I have to be on my phone and mylaptop for work therefore he doesn't get suspicious with the amount of time Ispend on it. Video calls usually happen when my boyfriend is either showeringor taking a nap. My apartment is a two-storey, so I know when he is awake orcoming down the stairs. The other man's girlfriend has a permit to go to workwhich means she's never there and I can call whenever.
"The only times I have felt bad for what I am doing was whenhe tried to change our lockdown situation. He would ask me out on a date nightwhere we would either cook together or he would cook, we dress up and sit atthe dining room table. The other time was when I was taking nudes for thisother man," Thandi explains.
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Thandi made it clear that she would continue talking to theother man throughout the lockdown period. Their constant chatting and sendingpictures are adding the bit of excitement she says is missing from her life.She emphasised on the fact she does not see the affair going any further oncethe lockdown is over.
"I am just looking for a bit of excitement in my life rightnow. I don't think I have it in me to move from chatting and video calling tothe physical side of things. It's harmless fun if you ask me and I already knowmy boyfriend is with me for the long run," she says.
*Nameshave been changed to protect the identity of the writer
